May 24th, 2007
Asia: For Abused And Bullied Afghan Women, Suicide Can Be The Only Way Out

BY MANABU KITAGAWA THE ASAHI SHIMBUN

KABUL--A woman planned to set herself on fire two years ago, unable to endure further physical and verbal abuse by her husband, his another wife and her children.

But she backed out at the last second because of her religious beliefs, and returned to the home where the beatings and bullying continued.

While choking back tears, the 45-year-old woman said: "Everyone gangs up on me. What have I done to them?"

She is not alone. Serious violations of women's human rights continue in Afghanistan, even after the Islamic fundamentalist Taliban regime, which deprived women of their basic rights, was toppled.

The plight of the women stems from such factors as religious perceptions, poverty, civil wars--and the centuries-long custom in the country of looking down on women.

Many Afghan women commit suicide to end the suffering caused by spousal abuse and forced marriages.

The 45-year-old woman, who asked not to be identified, was born in northern Afghanistan and married her husband, now 60, in 1992. She was the third wife of the man, who used to be a police officer.

She said she was "very happy" early on, but her husband's attitude changed about 10 years ago when the couple started living with his second wife and her children.

He smashed dishes, which she had bought, in front of her, and often yelled at her to leave the house. He also hit her face and slammed her head against the walls. His violence became an everyday affair.

The second wife gave birth to three boys while the third wife has not had any. She believes that is the reason for her husband's violence.

"In Afghan society, the birth of a boy is very appreciated while women are often considered beings whose purpose is to give birth to babies," said Orzala Ashraf, an activist pushing for human rights for Afghan women.

The husband's second wife and their children joined in on the bullying. One time, the second wife scattered kitchen garbage in the room of the third wife. When she complained about the mess to the second wife, her eldest son in his late 20s kicked her in the stomach and uttered, "Don't talk back to us."

She decided against her suicide attempt because she thought she would not be blessed by Allah for such a death. Under Afghan law, she could file for divorce. But she said she has neither the money nor a job to live alone.

In Islamic societies, one man can have up to four wives--on condition he treats the wives fairly.

"The way my husband treats me is against Islamic teachings, but I cannot complain about it," the third wife said. "If I did, I would be considered an indecent woman and would be beaten more severely."

The United Nations Development Fund for Women (UNIFEM) analyzed 1,327 cases of violence against women in Afghanistan that had been reported to administrative organizations and NGOs.

According to UNIFEM's report issued in August last year, 82 percent of the cases involved physical or mental abuse by husbands or other family members who lived with the victims.

The report said 419 women were beaten or kicked; 113 were forced into marriage; 107 women were not given proper meals or daily necessities: 60 were verbally abused; 45 received threats against their lives; and 26 were killed.

Based on the analysis, UNIFEM estimated that one-third of Afghan women have experienced domestic violence.

Some of the battered wives killed themselves despite an interpretation of Islamic teachings that forbids suicide. The women's decisions to defy the rules of their religion underscore their desperation.

The government-affiliated Afghan Independent Human Rights Commission recently conducted a survey on the situation facing women in Afghanistan. It found that at least 380 women killed themselves in the 18-month period from March 2005. Of them, 48.5 percent took their lives because of domestic violence.

Most of the abused women who killed themselves were young. Women between the ages of 20 and 25 years old accounted for 48.4 percent of those deaths, followed by those between 15 and 20 years old, at 38.7 percent. Girls between 10 and 15 years old accounted for 9.7 percent of the suicides.

The survey covered only five provinces in western and southern parts of the country.

Moreover, many families do not report suicides because they feel the acts would bring shame to the families. Therefore, the actual number of suicides in all of Afghanistan is probably much larger.

The practice of forced marriages symbolizes the disrespect for women in Afghanistan. A woman's father or other male relatives can decide her prospective husband regardless of her feelings. An NGO's report shows that 70 to 80 percent of marriages in Afghanistan are forced on the women.

That custom is deeply rooted, especially in rural areas, home to 80 percent of Afghanistan's population of about 24.5 million.

The practice is apparently based on efforts to maintain unity by keeping marriages within the tribe or group.

In such areas, woman also can be a "means" to gain money or settle disputes.

Five years ago, an 18-year-old office clerk from a farming village in the south was pressed by her uncle, who had been raising her, to marry an 80-year-old man.

The old man knew about the uncle's affair with a married woman, and he demanded the niece as a wife to keep the affair a secret.

The office clerk left home without marrying the old man.

However, most Afghan women follow such orders, partly because they believe they cannot disobey their parents. In addition, many women are not aware of their human rights--80 percent of Afghan women over 20 years old cannot read or write.

Afghanistan used to have a modernization movement. In 1965, a general election was held that allowed women to vote for the first time.

But moves toward a modern society were dashed with the Soviet invasion in 1979, followed by years of civil war.

The Soviet Union withdrew from Afghanistan in 1989, and Muslim guerrilla fighters known as mujahedin set up an interim government in 1992. However, during the civil war that started later in the year among groups of mujahedin, rape was common.

The situation did not improve for Afghan women. The Taliban emerged as a political power and took control of Kabul in 1996.

The Islamic fundamentalist group ruled with the strictest interpretation of Sharia law, depriving women of their rights to receive even an education or a job.

After the Taliban was ousted in 2001 in the U.S.-led war against terror, the government of President Hamid Karzai was established and began work to rebuild the country with the support of the international community.

In 2004, the government established a new Constitution that stipulates gender equality and bans forced marriage.

However, the central government cannot exercise much influence beyond the capital of Kabul. In rural areas, warlords of the Islamic guerrillas who fought the civil war hold stronger control over the locals than the central government.

In southern and eastern parts of the country, remnants of the Taliban, who stringently oppose the influx of Western culture into Afghanistan, are expanding their influence and stepping up attacks against government forces and allied troops.

The Constitution has been largely ignored. And the unemployment rate remains high and inflation has become a problem.

"Men who must support their families are becoming more and more depressed. As a result, they are becoming more and more violent (toward their wives)," said Manizha Naderi, director of an NGO called Women for Afghan Women.

The group is now setting up shelters to protect battered women.

In 2002, a radio station specializing in women's issues was set up in Kabul. The Voice of Afghan Women airs programs for nine hours a day to enlighten the public on the rights of women.

Organizers say they hope these fledgling but steady efforts will change the attitudes toward women in Afghanistan.(IHT/Asahi: May 24,2007)